Jump to content

  • Free consultations and support
  • Live chatClick Here for Live Chat
  • Call ico 1888-906-1888
    Phone support: Open

    Ready for your call :)

    Our business hours:

    Mon — Fri, 2am — 8pm (EST)

    US & EU support teams

    Phone support: Closed

    We are back in: 1h 20m

    Our business hours:

    Mon — Fri, 2am — 8pm (EST)

    US & EU support teams

Math Teacher Arrested

  • Please log in to reply


  • Guests

Posted 05 April 2005 - 09:17 PM

In case you missed this news!

AT NEW YORK's Kennedy airport today, an individual - later discovered
to be a public school teacher - was arrested trying to board a flight
while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a slide rule, and a
calculator. At a morning press conference, the U. S. Attorney General
disclosed that he believes the man to be a member of the notorious
al-gebra movement. He is being charged by the FBI with carrying
weapons of math instruction.

"Al-gebra is a fearsome cult," he declared. "They seek average
solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in
search of absolute value. They use secret code names like 'x' and 'y'
and refer to themselves as 'unknowns,' but we have determined they
belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with
coordinates in every country. As the Greek philanderer Isosceles
used to argue, there are three sides to every triangle."

When asked to comment on the arrest, the President stated, "If God had
wanted us to have better weapons of math instruction, He would have
given us more fingers and toes. I am gratified that our government has
shown us a sine that it is intent on protracting us from these
math-dogs, who are willing to disintegrate us with calculus disregard.
Murky statisticians love to inflict plane on every sphere of
influence. Under the circumferences, we must differentiate their root,
make our point, and draw the line."

The President warned, "These weapons of math instruction have the
potential to decimal everything in their math on a scalene never
before seen, unless we become exponents of a Higher Power and begin to
factor in random facts of vertex."

The Attorney General concluded, "As our Great Leader would say, read
my ellipse. Here is one principle he is uncertain of: though they
continue to multiply, their days are numbered as the hypotenuse

#2 Neupix


    Design Team Member

  • Designer
  • 1146 posts

Posted 05 April 2005 - 09:34 PM

LOL thats hilarious - a real funny story, and a perfect use of math terms! I bet my old High School math teacher would love this.
Neupix Media | Nip Napp! < iPhone App Reviews and News | Citrik Acid

#3 geek



  • Designer
  • 436 posts

Posted 06 April 2005 - 01:28 AM

:D :D :D

#4 PixelMaster


    Apprentice Designer

  • Designer
  • 30 posts

Posted 06 April 2005 - 04:02 AM

Awsome Sergey, thanks for sharing :)

0 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 0 guests, 0 anonymous users